


Eventually The Ground Levels

by GoingCaked



Series: No Path is Ever Completely Smooth [4]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexuality, Domestic, Kink Negotiation, M/M, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-01
Updated: 2015-05-01
Packaged: 2018-03-26 15:09:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3855196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoingCaked/pseuds/GoingCaked
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A glimpse at Ray and the boys several years down the road. Michael and Geoff want to do something 'special' over the weekend that holds the potential of bringing back bad memories for Ray. </p>
<p>Mostly just the boys being all domestic and couple-y.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Eventually The Ground Levels

**Author's Note:**

> This work contains: mild kink shaming, working through of negative views of sexuality, a character insulting themself.

Ray groaned and rolled over as the alarm blared. The amount of space in the new office was nice, but goddamn did he not like having to get up even earlier.

Ray had even freaking _mentioned_ about potential new offices when they'd been house hunting, but apparently Burnie had assured Geoff that Matt had assured him that they'd always stay on the same side of the river.

Ray didn't know who had lied but he was not impressed.

So what had gone from a two minute walk, to a five minute car ride, was now a fucking fifty minute commute. He didn't even know why they bothered going to the office. They could just do their stupid Let's Plays here and send Lindsay and the others their stuff.

But apparently everyone had thought he was joking way more than he actually had been when he'd suggested that, so they still had to get up earlier than was humanly reasonable.

"Get out of bed, assholes," Michael called into the room in his typical morning greeting. The douche was a fucking morning person. It wasn't natural.

Ray buried his face deeper in his pillow as Michael flicked on the lights. Ryan was the first of the _proper_ sleepers to rise, taking his warmth with him. Ray grabbed his still warm blankets and snuggled into them. If the asshole was going to surrender to morning than Ray didn't need him.

But unfortunately Ray did have to get out of bed eventually. Stupid Geoff never accepted blowjobs _or_ achievement grinding as payment for getting to go in late.

Ray rolled out of bed and bypassed the en-suit bathroom entirely. Downside of getting up last meant that it was already occupied, so instead he went to the hall bathroom for his morning ritual, all the while cursing Geoff, and Rooster Teeth, and the house, and the sun. Just like he did every morning.

Miraculously this ended up being his one in ten mornings where he managed to make it downstairs with enough time to spare to do more than just grab something to eat as he ran out the door.

Geoff made actual breakfast almost every morning, because Geoff was the best, and Ray grabbed some eggs and toast before sitting down between Jack and a seemingly still asleep Ryan.

Ray gave him a nudge and his head shot up from where it was lolling to the side. Ryan blinked around confused before returning to his own breakfast, only to start nodding off again. The mystery of how Ryan had totalled so many cars hadn't remained so mysterious after moving in with the guy. Seriously, Geoff and Jack should be given medals for getting him off the road in the mornings.

After breakfast they all gathered up their shit to head out.

"Hey Gav, mind riding with Jack today?" Geoff asked Gavin as they headed to the cars.

Gavin shrugged, too busy paying attention to his phone. Ray put it at about 50/50 if he would realize which car he was in before they reached the main street.

Michael and Geoff climbed into Geoff's car, probably for road head or to talk about Let's Play stuff or whatever it was they were into, and Ray and the others got into Jack's soccer-mom-mobile. He had gotten it when they'd all moved in together and the thing _really_ didn't belong to a childless guy who played video games for a living, and the others had _so delicately_ informed Jack of that at least once a day since he'd gotten the thing, but Ray had to admit it was very useful to have a vehicle that could comfortably fit all six of them.

Michael seemed kind of nervous all morning. Ray figured it must have had something to do with why Geoff had wanted to ride alone with him, but he couldn't think of what Geoff could have done. Michael didn't look upset, just jumpy, so Ray figured he didn't need to get Ryan to kick Geoff's ass.

Ray wasn't sure if he should be the one to ask Michael about it or not. Michael had known him the longest, so that would _seem_ to make him the go to, but as much as Michael had tried to reassure him it wasn't the case, Ray wasn't the one Michael was closest too. But then again whatever he was nervous about seemed to involve Geoff and Gavin would rather pee fire ants than initiate an emotional conversation, so maybe he _should_ say something? He'd wait until tonight though. Michael always seemed to like people and sharing more than he did, but Ray was at least a little sure that Michael wouldn't appreciate him jumping down his throat over the littlest thing, so he would just wait and see if Michael calmed down. Hell, if it involved Geoff that meant there was a good chance it was a work thing and Michael would just _tell_ him soon enough.

Michael didn't get less twitchy. He was even tense during recording, and Michael was _amazing_ at bottling shit away from the camera. And speaking of game faces… when Ray actually started to look for it he noticed that Geoff was a bit off too, which was weird as fuck.

Ray followed Jack to the kitchen when he went to stretch his legs and grab a mid afternoon snack. It was debatable who’s job it was to deal with Michael issues, but Geoff issues _definitely_ weren't his.

"Uhh," Ray started awkwardly as he kind of tried to use his body to edge Jack further from the Achievement Hunter door to make it harder for someone to listen in, "Have you noticed anything up with Geoff today?"

Whatever Ray had been expecting definitely wasn't for Jack to turn red and look away embarrassed. "Uhh, yeah. Don't worry about it for now, okay?"

Ray blinked. _Okay_ , now he wanted to know what was up to get Jack to blush, but Ray decided to pretend to be a proper adult for once and squashed down his curiosity. "Kay," he answered and grabbed a water and turned to go back to the office. He was very proud of himself that he didn't turn around and give Jack a 'cheeky look'.

They didn't have anymore recording for the rest of the day, mostly because half of them were occupied doing other shit. It also meant that Ray was doing other stuff that didn't cause his mind to wander as much as playing games sometimes did, so he didn't have time to dwell on what was possibly up with Geoff and Michael.

He spent the afternoon sending off work e-mails and wading through fan stuff. He was glad to see that the sponge jokes were dying down. Man had he never regretted a stupid gag as much as he did that one. The fans had been fucking _relentless_ about it since he'd come out, and that had been almost a _year_ ago. He had kind of casually mentioned it in a stream, half thinking it would just be easier to jokingly pretend to be asexual than jokingly pretending to be straight, or bi, or whatever, and that had been true for the most part. It was _much_ more comfortable to get to joke about his _actual_ sexuality in videos than it had been to do the whole 'sexless-oversexed-bisexual-virgin thing'. At least the fans sponge 'jokes' broke up the endless stream of 'just blaze' shit, even if it did make Ray sometimes long for the straight forward 'no sch tng, u jst a vigrin n GAY' comments.

  
  


*

  
  


Tonight was enchilada night. As far as Ray could tell Ryan _did_ actually enjoy cooking, but for some reason enchiladas were a strictly bi-monthly thing. Not that Ray was going to complain. No matter what was being made or who was making it he got an endless stream of effort free food. Living with boyfriends that liked cooking was awesome.

There was still something up with Geoff and Michael, if the fact that Geoff had told Ryan to drive Ray and Gavin and pulled Jack into his car was any indication. From Jack's reaction in the kitchen Ray seriously doubted it was anything bad, at least. Maybe someone was pregnant?

But whatever it was it led to Michael hiding in the gaming room and Geoff avoiding them all by doing yard work when they got home.

Ray went and fixed himself in front of his X-Box in the living room. It had taken them a surprisingly long time to figure out that if they wanted Ray to spend more time out of the gaming room, _and_ didn't want the TV being monopolized that they should just _get another TV_. Gavin had held out on the idea the longest, like he somehow thought it was somehow surrendering to how lame they were, which was ridiculous since they really couldn't get any more lame than playing video games a _day job._

Ray killed time playing while Gavin and Jack cycled between watching him and acting like he was super great at games (something that was only true when in comparison to them, but was still a nice ego stroke all the same), and doing their own shit, while Ryan cooked and Michael and Geoff hid.

Enchiladas were as good as ever, and Ray tried to heap praise on them in the distant hope that it would encourage Ryan to cook them more. Although it was fucking Ryan, so there was always the chance that that was just encouraging him to cook them _less_ to 'increase rarity' or some shit.

All through dinner Geoff and Michael kept nervously glancing at each other, and Michael was restlessly shoving his food in his face so fast that Ray was kind of scared for his stomach.

Ryan glanced over at him and raised his eyebrow to ask Ray if he knew what was going on. Ray shook his head because he didn't and glanced over at Jack to tell Ryan that _he_ knew. Jack gave him a slight annoyed look at the sell out but Ray just shrugged at him before Jack turned to Ryan and shook his head 'later'.

Gavin was too focused on the food to notice anything.

After they finished eating Geoff cleared his throat awkwardly, "Uhh, Ray, could Michael and I talk to you for a minute?"

Ray blinked in surprise at being singled out but stood to follow them anyway. Gavin and Ryan gave him a questioning look, and Jack avoided eye contact.

The fuck could Michael and Geoff want to talk to him about? If it was a work thing they would have talked about it _at work_ , and if it was some group issue then they would have been doing it in a group.

Or, shit, wait, had he done something to one of them? It wasn't exactly a fair thing to do, but it had become pretty common for one of them to bring 'emotional support' when they had to have one of those uncomfortable talks that were essential to keeping a relationship running. But what could he have done? He didn't think he had neglected either of them recently, but then again if he was forgetting about someone he would hardly remember it, would he? But that wouldn't explain why Michael had been so nervous all day. Pointing out to someone that they had been neglecting you was always awkward, but with six people in the relationship it was unfortunately also pretty common, he didn't see why that would make either of them so worked up?

So then it was something worse? He racked his brain going over what he could have done recently to upset one of them but couldn't think of anything. He guessed he could think of a couple of things that one of them might want to have a discussion about, but nothing that seemed like it would warrant backup or this much nerves.

So then… what?

Ray had a sudden realization and groaned internally. Their nervousness, Jack's reaction, the fact that they wanted to talk to him alone.

Yeah. This was a sex thing.

Ray couldn't help the pang of guilt that went through his stomach every time he needed to be treated with kiddie gloves about sex. He _shouldn't_ need that. But he could hardly deny that he _did,_ which made it so much worse. But it wasn't like any of the others were dicks about it, and he guessed that was just the price you payed for being in a relationship like this. God knows he put up with some shit.

He wondered if there was anyone for who thinking logically through their emotions did anything other than make them feel guilty for said emotions.

They went into the streaming/recording room and Geoff and Michael awkwardly sat down on the couch, conspicuously not touching each other, which just kind of confirmed what Ray had already figured out.

God he hoped they weren't about to confess they'd accidentally boned on his hoodie again.

Michael and Geoff half-looked, half-thoroughly-didn't-look at each other before Michael cleared his throat.

Ray sat down and waited patiently for Michael to begin, but he just continued looking down at his feet.

Oh god, what had they cum on this time? If it was his controller he would fucking kill them.

Finally Michael cleared his throat and actually started. "So, umm, Geoff and I were…" Michael looked up at him and trailed off, Ray raised his eyebrow. Michael looked away and took a deep breath and let out a half laugh that was clearly supposed to help relieve Michael's tension, but just as clearly didn't. "Right. So me and Geoff wanted to try something."

"Okay," Ray prompted. So they hadn't cum on any of his stuff this time. That was a relief. But why would they come to _him_ to try something in bed? His list of things he would do was much shorter than any of the others, with the possible exception of Gavin.

Michael bit his lip, "We aren't asking you to join," Michael clarified hurriedly, which just made Ray even more curious. He glanced at Geoff but Geoff just looked even tenser, before looking back at Michael. Michael swallowed heavily, "We wanted to try something that would take up a whole weekend."

"Wouldn't you get tired?" Ray blurted out, the surprise removing the filter he usually had between his brain and mouth.

Michael snorted, seeming to think Ray was joking, which was probably good for Ray's image, because he suspected whatever Michael had meant was obvious and not stupid at all, not that he had any fucking idea what that could be.

Michael shook his head, "No, not a weekend of banging. Like a scene. Kind of."

Ray nodded in understanding. Scenes were something he knew about. Gavin, Ryan and he had had many fun nights playing around and laughing through 'X-Ray and Vav vs the Mad King'. Michael and Geoff usually went for the more 'serious hardcore business' and type scenes, or at least that was the impression Ray got from the little he had seen. As much fun as some stuff was, that kind of thing just left him feeling smothered and uncomfortable. He didn't want to be a party pooper, he really didn't, but he wasn't sure if he could put up with that for an entire weekend.

Ray was trying to think how to ask if they could wait for the next time he was out of town without sounding super demanding when Geoff finally spoke up.

"Not a scene. I mean there would be sex stuff like in a scene, but it wouldn't be a _scene_ scene. You know?"

Ray shook his head slowly, "Not really." He was over pretending that he knew everything about sex, had been for years. Plus, Geoff wasn't exactly being very clear.

Michael blushed and looked down. "A cock-cage. I want Geoff to put me in a cock-cage for a weekend."

Ray's eyebrows went up at that. "Oh."

Well then. Ray had known that Michael and Geoff were into that kind of thing. Despite usually avoiding being a part of it when they were doing it he was still _aware_. If nothing else there was the fact that Geoff had a bad habit of TMI, and it wasn't like they hid their toys. So, yeah, even if Ray wasn't totally familiar with it he still knew it was happening. He _hadn't_ known that it was something they wanted to do outside of sex.

That was weird, right? That they wanted to do that for the whole weekend? That was like a slightly different flavour of sexuality wasn't it? Or was that divide between 'rough but normal' and 'kinky fetish shit' just made up? It was probably made up. Most shit about sex categories seemed to have been pulled out of someone's' ass(heh).

But, shit, wait. If Geoff and Michael weren't 'normal' than how much could he trust the answers they'd given him about sexuality? Fucking shit, if they were super bizarre freaky than he'd have to go and re-evaluate everything again.

No fuck that, he'd just be wrong. It didn't fucking matter, and he wasn't going to go through all the work of restructuring his entire world view again just because two of his boyfriends were into some shit.

Hell there was probably no reason too either. It felt like it was something prudish and not sex positive to try and class BDSM shit in an entirely different category from 'regular sex'.

But it _also_ felt a little wrong to group it as entirely the same. After all wasn't _his_ sexuality just a bit to the side of normal, and he'd definitely not appreciate someone trying to erase that in the name of 'inclusiveness' or whatever.

But he supposed that also wasn't his problem. If Geoff and Michael wanted to identify as something they would just tell Ray, and until that point there was no reason for him to worry about it. Which meant the only thing for him to worry about was the issue at hand.

Ray bit his lip and looked at his boyfriends pensive faces and decided to just 'communicate', "Why? Like what would you be doing? Why do you think you'd like it?" Ray winced internally at how judgy that sounded to his ears, but fuck it, they would know what he meant, it wasn't like this kind of conversation hadn't been way too popular a couple of years ago.

Michael's cheeks started to redden in a way Ray had only seen maybe twice before, but he continued, "We were just going to, you know, have Geoff teasing. And stuff."

Ray nodded, "So like a control thing?"

Michael shrugged, "I guess?" he mumbled.

Ray felt a flash of annoyance at how little Michael was giving him, especially considering how much Ray had been made to talk about this shit, but he supposed that wasn't fair. It wasn't like he'd started out super clear about things. Ray knew what it was like to share something that was deeply personal and almost impossibly hard to put into words, he wasn't going to be an asshole about it.

That didn't mean he was still 100% on board about the weekend session without getting more information. He suddenly felt much more empathy to the past others for having to try and play the balancing act between spooking him and getting the information they neededto proceed.

This was clearly something that Michael wanted, and Ray didn't want to add unnecessary wait time, but then again… this _really_ seemed like something that could potentially make him super uncomfortable.

"Do you guys have like some sort of itinerary, or were you just going to wing it?"

Geoff shrugged, "We planned it out a little. Some stuff we'd like to do. But we didn't want to really plan anything without finding out what you were okay with. Or the others for that matter."

"I guess I can put up with just having Michael in the cage," Ray conceded, "I'm, umm, not so sure about how I'd feel about you doing all the teasing stuff in front of me, though."

Geoff nodded hurriedly, "Yeah, yeah, no problem. We can just use the gaming room, or you can. Whatever makes you more comfortable. We were already planning to use the spare room for sleeping and boning."

Ray nodded hesitantly, "Oookay," he said, "I guess that would be all right then. If it was just Michael being super horny and you did most of the stuff away from me."

Ray felt another brief flash of guilt for putting conditions on their play, but if they wanted it to be just about the two of them then they shouldn't have four other boyfriends, Ray tried to reassure himself. It was habit after so long, and the guilt was swept aside quickly. That was just part of making relationships work after all.

"Okay then," Geoff said, snapping into faux cheer, clapping his hands together and standing up, "If you're good then I guess we'd better go discuss this with Ryan and Gavin. Make sure they're okay with it too."

Geoff grabbed Michael's arm and started leading him out the door. Michael shot Ray a slightly pleading look. Faux cheerful Geoff was never a good thing. Ray just laughed. Sometimes he was _so glad_ that he never had to worry about having that kind of conversation.

Ray hung back while Michael sat through Geoff faking confidence through the conversation with Ryan, Gavin, and Jack. Clearly Geoff had used up his store of being serious about sex on Ray, and Michael looked mortified at some of the pet names Geoff was calling him.

Ryan sat there listening politely, like he always did, but Gavin very quickly started spluttering and looking embarrassed.

"But Michael!" he crowed, "You can't do something like that! What about Ray!"

Michael glanced guiltily over at Ray, and Geoff frowned at Gavin. Ray shrugged, "We already talked about it. Figured it would be fine.”

Gavin didn't look any more reassured, "But wouldn't that be really awkward for you? You never seemed to like that stuff before?"

Ray stood up from where he was leaning and went to sit next to Gavin. He was a little annoyed with him. If Ray said he was fine, then Gavin should just accept that, not try and argue with him. It was _exhausting_ having someone around who never trusted him about his own brain.

But, hey, they would talk about the upcoming sex-ness like adults.

Then Ray and Gavin would have the nine hundredth iteration of the 'stop treating me like a child' conversation.

"Don't worry about me, Gav. I can watch out for myself if something I don't like happens."

Gavin still looked uncertain, "But didn't you make us promise we'd never not have sex again?"

Ray frowned at him as he tried to figure out what Gavin was talking about, then he remembered. All those years ago after they'd had a competition to not cum the longest. Jesus fuck Gavin had a specifically good memory. Ray had kind of forgotten about that. But now that he was thinking about it he _could_ remember that bet being pretty horrible for him. Enough even that it had caused him to realize 'no actually, you _aren't_ like everyone else'. And, okay, Gavin kind of did have a point there. This _would_ be a lot like that, what with the whole festering, suffocating arousal thing. But it wouldn't be the same, right? For starters, Ray now knew what was going on in his own head and at least _kind of_ knew what was going on in the others, so there wouldn't be the same sense of a nameless and terrifying film on everything. Plus this would be just one person, for just a weekend. It should be fine.

Of course that didn't mean it _would_ be fine. Maybe it had been all those other factors that had freaked him out so hard last time, or maybe not? But, hey, he'd come a long way since then. It would probably be fine. And if it wasn't he could always just pull the plug on it.

Ray shook his head at Gavin, "Don't worry dude. I'm not going to freak out. If I really do need it to end I'm sure Michael and Geoff would understand," Ray reassured Gavin, glancing over at Geoff for back-up.

Geoff nodded vigorously, "Of course. This kind of involves all of you, so you can all end it at any time if you're uncomfortable, yeah? This is just, you know, trying it out."

Gavin looked between Ray and Geoff, still looking reluctant, but nodded anyways, "Okay," he said hesitantly, "if you're okay with it X-Ray, then I guess it's okay."

Ray heard Michael let out a sigh of relief and saw Geoff's shoulders relax out of the corner of his eye now that they’d gotten the go ahead from everyone.

"Well then," Geoff said, snapping back to his cheerful demeanour after the brief seriousness, "If everyone's okay with it, then I guess we can get down to brass tacks. I was thinking of doing it this weekend. Everyone good with that?"

Ray, Jack and Ryan nodded, while Gavin just continued to look worriedly at Ray, but Ray was ignoring him. If he still had a problem he could use his damn words.

Geoff nodded back at their agreement, "Okay then. Michael and I don't have a set plan, we were thinking just a bunch of teasing and occasional sex. Ray said he didn't want all the teasing in front of him, so is it okay if Michael co-ops the gaming room for the weekend?"

"Actually," Ray spoke up, "How about I have the gaming room and you guys take the living room?" Ray didn't know exactly what was going to go down that weekend. As much as he tried he still had a hard time predicting when arousal and shit would strike his boyfriends, and he didn't know what this whole thing would do to the others. He kind of wanted to make sure he had a place to hide out if he needed a break. Plus, spending the whole weekend in the living room with the others wasn't totally appealing. He liked having somewhere to go be alone and if the gaming room and one of the spare bedrooms was taken up with Geoff and Michael then there wasn't anywhere else he could guarantee privacy.

Geoff nodded, "You sure?" Ray hummed in agreement, "Alright then. Everyone else cool with us doing stuff in the living room? No sex, obviously, but teasing _sexy_ time stuff."

The other three nodded in agreement and Ryan was starting to look seriously interested, "So Michael," he asked, "is this just totally something between you and Geoff, or could any of us join in?"

Michael blushed scarlet. It was pretty damn cute seeing Michael like that, Ray had to admit. If that was how he was like all 'needy' and shit than Ray could kind of see the appeal. "Yeah," Michael muttered, "That's fine. Just, you know, pay attention to safewords and shit."

Geoff butted in, "And you all remember the safewords right?"

Gavin squawked, "What do we need safewords for this? Won't no mean no?" He sounded kind of indignant.

Geoff frowned at him, "It just makes communication easier if we have something we know for certain means stop and slow down," he explained patiently, for probably the thousandth time.

"Yeah Gav," Ray teased, "I can remember a couple of times _your_ 'no' didn't mean no."

Gavin spluttered for a couple seconds. He always seemed to prefer pretending that he didn't enjoy the occasional kinky play session, then choked out, "Well alright then. And stoplights. We all know that."

Geoff nodded, "Good," he said, somehow not making it sound paternalistic, because Geoff was made of more mature stuff than Ray was.

"What are you using as the chastity device?" Ryan asked, sounding all clinical and interested. Ray glanced over and smirked to himself at the tent in Ryan's pants. Ryan was a fucking weirdo.

"The plastic one," Geoff answered.

Ryan frowned, "That one can be slipped out of," he said, voice starting to take on a strong hint of arousal.

Ray continued to smirk. He always found it at least a little funny when one of his boys started to lose themselves. It wasn't like he didn't know the feeling, he had had some pretty hot jerk-off sessions in his time, it was just that they seemed to fall into it _so_ easily. It was kind of silly.

The conversation wrapped up pretty quickly after that and Ryan, Geoff and Michael hurried off to the bedroom as soon as the conversation was over. Gavin clearly didn't want anything to do with that kind of play, and it seemed Jack just wasn't that into it, so the three of them stayed in the living room. Eventually they settled in, Jack playing Trials on one TV, Ray playing COD on the other, and Gavin editing on the living room computer.

Gavin still seemed to be sulking a little, but it was probably nothing, he just got a stick up his ass about sex shit sometimes.

  
  


*

  
  


The weekend came quickly, and as much as Ray was feeling nervous about the possibility of freaking out about everything, he also couldn't help feeling at least a little bit of the excitement rolling off of Geoff and Michael. He wondered how long they'd been wanting to do this for. Ray knew they'd been doing kinky shit together since even before he'd moved to Austin, so it could have been something they had wanted to do for _years_. It was pretty cool getting to see them so excited. Ray hoped it worked out for them.

Of course everyone else was also feeling second (or in Ryan's case first) hand excitement and arousal so there had been a _lot_ of boning lately. Despite usually being okay with sex, Ray was still super uncomfortable with having sex when the arousal was that palatable, and had spent most nights in one of the other bedrooms, or stayed up until he heard the noise settle down.

That Thursday night was one of the few times they actually used all three of their active rooms. Ray had been sleeping in the spare room for the last couple of nights, joined by Gavin. Then at some point during the night Ryan had gotten fed up with Michael and Geoff's constant humping and gone and slept in the other spare room so that he could actually get some _sleep_.

All Friday Michael kept trying to mess around to overcompensate for his nerves, only encouraged by an equally strung up Geoff and Gavin, and by the time the day was coming to a close Ray was just really glad that he would get to be _away_ from anyone for a little. As much as he loved them they could still get on his nerves at times, and Ray could tell that Jack and Ryan were starting to get annoyed too, which, you know, good kick off to the weekend.

When it was time to go home Ray could tell that Jack and Ryan were just as glad as him that they didn't have to ride in the 'loud asshole' car, instead getting to commute home in the more relaxing 'quiet asshole' van.

Geoff and Michael had said they didn't want to start until after dinner. As soon as they all got in the door Ryan made an excuse about needing a nap, Jack said he needed to get some work done in their home office, and Ray sequestered himself in the gaming room, hoping that once they got started Michael would calm down. But if not, eh, it wasn't that big a deal. He could just avoid Michael for the weekend and then they'd all be back to normal on Monday.

Ray was surprised when Gavin tentatively knocked on the door and came in. He had a brief flash of annoyance that Gavin was coming to be more of an asshole at him when he just wanted quiet, but Gavin didn't seem as terribly energetic as he had earlier, instead he just looked shy and uncertain.

Ray immediately felt bad about not wanting Gavin there. Ray was pretty sure that Gavin's prudishness about sex had to be making him a bit tense too.

"Hey X-Ray."

"Hey Vav. Sup?"

Gavin shrugged shyly, "Think you could do some two player missions in GTA with me? I need to level up."

Ray snorted fondly, "Yeah you do. Come on." Ray scooted over on the couch to give Gavin space.

Ray debated whether or not he should say something reassuring. He eventually decided he wouldn't. He never appreciated when Gavin got all up in his shit about everything, so Ray would return the favour and back off until Gavin said anything. Gavin was probably just being a prima donna about kink stuff. He got like that sometimes when one of them wanted to do something that Gavin didn't think of as 'normal.' Apparently the fact that Gavin lived in a gay six-some was no reason for him to not be _normal_. He seemed pretty enthusiastic about most things when he was convinced to try them, and he _definitely_ seemed to like the whip.

But whatever, Ray was more than willing to provide a nice quiet reprieve for him if that’s what he wanted.

Dinner was kind of awkward, with half the group full of excited anticipation, and half the group planning what games they would play while hiding from it. Ray was kind of surprised that Geoff had actually bothered to cook. He knew if _he'd_ tried to cook while he was that wired he would be more likely to burn the house down or cut his hand off or something.

Once they finished eating Geoff and Michael practically tripped over each other trying to quickly gather up the dishes. Finally Jack stood up, "Why don't you guys go, we'll clean up," he offered, averting the inevitable dropped plate mess.

Geoff looked at him with blown pupils, then looked over to get a nod from Michael and they practically skipped upstairs.

Jack chuckled to himself and he and the rest of them started gathering up the dishes.

"I'm surprised you're not up their with them," Jack commented to Ryan.

Ryan chuckled, "They said they'd rather the initial part be just them."

Jack hummed as he started scraping the plates, "But you are planning on joining them soon?"

"Oh yeah. How about you? I know this isn't a huge kink for you, but you can't tell me you aren't at least a little interested."

Jack shrugged, "Yeah, I figure I'll be up their eventually."

Ryan nodded, "You know I'm sure Geoff at least would love to get to do some 'directing' if me and you were up there at the same time."

Jack laughed, "Yeah I'm sure he would. I don't know. We'll see."

Ryan turned to Gavin, who hadn't gotten up to help with the dishes, "What about you?"

Ray tensed a little and felt Jack do the same. Ray hadn't mentioned to anyone else that Gavin was being extra weird about this. Evidently Jack had noticed on his own and Ryan _hadn't_.

Gavin looked up jerkily and plastered a not entirely real looking smile on his face, "Course. Seeing little Michael all desperate sounds fun."

Ray would have bet cash money that Ryan didn't buy that, but he didn't comment. He did share a look with Jack, who gave him a return look to reassure Ryan that it was covered and he could enjoy himself without worrying about it.

  
  


*

  
  


Michael and Geoff spent a long time up in the room. Ray kind of doubted that they would come down that night, but he still wasn't going to start an achievement that would take a long time just in case they reappeared and he wanted to ditch for the gaming room. Gavin had disappeared somewhere, and Ryan had gone to the sound proof streaming room to have an overly gooey conversation with his long distance high school sweetheart, which left Jack and he zoning out on games for some unmeasurable amount of time before, surprisingly, Michael and Geoff _did_ come downstairs.

Geoff looked like a bird in the cream, or whatever that expression was, and Michael was red faced and sweaty. Michael shoved his hands in his pockets and met Ray and Jack's questioning look with a glare, "You got a problem?" he snapped, all bravado.

Jack rolled his eyes and Ray snickered a little bit. Pissy Michael was always fun.

Geoff slinked over to the couch and sprawled himself over it. He looked over in lazy contentment at Ray, "You good to stay or are you going to take off?"

Geoff almost managed to not cut his eyes to Michael while saying that, thus giving away just how much of a show he was putting on for Michael's benefit. Sometimes it astounded Ray that Geoff was an actual actor.

Ray shrugged and scooted a little farther from Geoff, "Nah." He was pretty curious about what they were going to do and kind of wanted to see how it played out.

Geoff turned his attention back to Michael and smirked at him, "You going to take a seat?"

Michael glared back and walked forward, only slightly stiff. Ray wondered if Geoff had shoved something up his ass or if it was just the blue balls. Michael did his best to not look too awkward as he sat down next to Geoff. Geoff immediately wrapped his arm around Michael and pulled him in. "Hey Jack, why don't you throw the game on?" Geoff said, not paying any attention to Jack.

Jack and Ray had a brief silent argument about who had to give up their TV, which Jack lost, and he turned to the football game.

It didn't take long for Ray to zone back out on the game and his achievements and lose track of what Michael and Geoff were doing, until the small noises coming from Michael started to get more urgent.

Ray looked at them out of the corner of his eye. Geoff was kneading at Michael's thigh, thumb tantalizingly close to Michael's crotch. Suddenly Ray felt himself flash back to that half forgotten bet years ago. He could feel the ghosts of unwanted hands on him, and the accompanying phantom twist in his stomach.

But it was a distant thing. Something Ray could examine through time and space, but couldn't really hurt him anymore.

It had freaked him out then, really badly. He supposed it made sense that Gavin was scared that seeing this would set him off. How confusing must it have been for Gavin and the others to have been doing this basically innocent, playful thing with him and have him react like they were _attacking_ him?

But as much as Ray now _understood_ what was actually happening between Michael and Geoff he couldn't help feeling the smallest twisting in his gut. Ray tried to sooth himself with the fact that Michael was actually into it, painfully so if he had wanted to do this all weekend, despite how it might look from Ray's perspective. Ray felt a bit stupid that it was unsettling him at all, but whatever.

It was actually getting a bit _annoying_ being so close to them, and Ray was starting to get a bit of a 'nails on a chalkboard' feeling from it.

He didn't want to make it super obvious that he was annoyed and ruin the mood for Geoff and Michael, but he also didn't want to hang around any longer. Ray waited until he finished up his next achievement before leaving, hoping it could be played off as casual. He felt super obvious as he did it, but the others hardly seemed to notice and just gave him a half wave goodnight.

Ray considered setting himself up in the gaming room, but then glanced at the time. Usually he stayed up so late on Friday's that it was Saturday when he went to bed, but he hadn't gotten the best sleep the last few nights what with how energetic his boyfriends had been, so he decided to turn in early for once.

Ray lazily went through his bedtime ritual, deciding he'd rather sleep by himself in the other spare room rather than with Gavin, Jack, and an undoubtedly horny Ryan in the main room.

He pushed the door to the other spare room open, intending to mess around on his DS for a bit, but instead found the room already occupied.

Gavin was sitting cross legged on the bed with a laptop open. He jumped and slammed it shut when Ray opened the door.

Ray raised his eyebrows at his guilty expression, "You know porn can be a healthy part of sexuality," he joked.

Gavin squawked indignantly, "I wasn't looking at porn."

Ray shrugged, teasing, "Don't know why not, porn's great. I'll hit you up with some recommendations if you want."

Gavin spluttered more, still looking guilty about whatever it was he'd been doing. " _Ray_ ," he breathed, sounding scandalized.

Ray snickered, "Whatever man, none of my business. Were you planning on sleeping here tonight?" Now that Ray had gotten over the surprise of finding Gavin, it really was weird that he would be in here by himself, presumably not doing work. Gavin freaking loved being around people.

Gavin shrugged, "Yeah, maybe."

Ray nodded, "Mind if I join you?" Ray kind of wanted to be on his own, but he wasn't too annoyed that it looked like that wasn't going to happen. If something was up with Gavin then Ray was fine with providing some physical comfort.

Gavin shook his head, "No. That's fine. Just going to turn in myself."

Ray nodded, snickering some more at Gavin's continued nervousness over whatever it was he had been doing.

Gavin gave him one last look as he scurried out of the room to go brush his teeth.

Ray pulled the half-made covers back and climbed in, flicking his lamp on, trusting that Gavin would get the lights when he came back. Ray wondered if Gavin would want to play some Pokemon before going to sleep, or if he wanted to just doze straight off. Some of the guys were fine with someone sitting next to them playing, but Gavin wasn't one of them.

Gavin came back shortly, in his pj's and still looking nervous. "You okay there, Vav?" Ray asked, raising his eyebrow.

"Top," Gavin reassured, not sounding it, and shut the door and hit the lights before going over and climbing in the other side of the bed. Gavin was the one he shared a bed two-sies with the most, and they had a pretty ingrained sleeping position by now, but instead of moving to cuddle up to Ray's back like usual Gavin lay on his side looking awkwardly at Ray. Ray frowned over at him, "What?"

Instead of answering Gavin jerkily brought out his arm to catch the back of Ray's head and pulled him down for a kiss. Ray only flailed a little bit at the unexpected move, and tried to reposition himself for a better angle, but Gavin pulled them both up to a sitting position instead.

"Michael's hot, isn't he?" Gavin said, sounding odd. Ray raised his eyebrow. He'd definitely gotten the strong impression that Gavin wasn't in to it. Plus Gavin hadn't actually _seen_ Michael all blue balled up yet.

Ray shrugged, "Not really my thing, but yeah, it's kind of cute."

Gavin nodded, "Yeah. Even you like it."

Ray started to frown and opened his mouth to ask Gavin what he was talking about but before he could, Gavin shoved one hand down Ray's pants and tried to work his own shirt off with the other, and almost fell off the bed.

Ray reached out and steadied him, "Woah there," he said as he grabbed Gavin to keep him from falling off the bed. "Guess that porn really got you going, huh?" he joked.

Gavin pursed his lips and glanced away, "I wasn't- Michael is really hot, yeah? All sexy and needy and what? It would be anyone's fantasy."

"I don't know. I'm not sure Jack's super into it. And I said I thought it was _cute_ not sexy."

Gavin didn't seem to really be listening, instead just staring at Ray intently. Ray was _pretty_ sure he wanted to bone. Fuck, Gavin must have been _really_ into it if he wanted to have sex with Ray, usually Gavin didn't even want to watch movies with nudity around Ray, so as much as he wasn't really into the idea he wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to finally prove to Gavin that he was _fine_ with sex.

"We can have a quickie if you want," Ray offered.

Gavin nodded furiously, "Yeah, okay," he said, sounding a bit strained. This time Gavin focused all his attention on stripping off his clothes so there weren't anymore near misses with the side of the bed.

Ray turned to the bedside table and pulled out the lube and condoms before turning back to Gavin, "So who's pitching?" He kind of hoped Gavin wanted that job, Ray was pretty sure he'd have to grab a cock ring to keep things up at the moment.

Gavin just looked kind of twitchy, even more so than he usually did when words and sex were combined.

Ray caught a glimpse of his still floppy cock. Not being able to get a proper stiffie when you wanted he understood, but it didn't look like Gavin was into it at all. "You having trouble there?" Ray asked, scooting closer, intending to provide a 'helping hand' if Gavin wanted.

Gavin shook his head vigorously, "No, I got it." He reached out hurriedly and grabbed the lube off of Ray and squirted some onto his hand before wrapping it around his cock and started pumping slightly desperately.

Ray frowned at him. He wasn't exactly a sex master or anything, but Ray was pretty sure he knew a lost dick cause when he saw one.

As Gavin pumped more and more desperately without any results Ray figured he was right.

"We can do something else, if you want," Ray offered. Gavin looked kind of really distressed and Ray didn't like it.

Gavin didn't look at him, "My dick works fine," he scowled.

"Yeah, okay, not saying it doesn't. I bang Geoff, it's not like I'm not used to things having the occasional hiccup," Ray tried to lighten the mood. That particular course wasn't very likely to work though, especially since it was _Gavin_ who had the most difficulty getting it up, not Geoff. Ray knew he was kind of self-conscious about it, but he'd never actually had to deal with Gavin having this problem on his own. Ray kind of felt lost and wanted to run and grab one of the others.

Instead he and Gavin sat there awkwardly for a couple seconds, Gavin glaring at his dick, and Ray trying to figure out what to do, before Ray hesitantly offered, "I can blow you if you want? You don't need wood for that?"

Ray was pretty sure that that wasn't the right thing to say if the way Gavin stiffened was anything to go by, but Gavin immediately sat up straighter and seemed to be trying to pull a mask on for some fucking reason, "That'd be top, X-Ray," he chirped happily.

Ray frowned at him for a moment before grabbing the tissues and wiping away most of the lube before swallowing him down.

Ray kind of liked giving blowjobs. It was nice to give something to his partners, and there was something about having something alive and moving in his mouth that he liked, despite how disgusting that description sounded.

That being said it was hard to concentrate when Ray had such a strong feeling that Gavin wasn't into what was going on. He barely even managed to get a half chub, despite Ray's, if he could say so himself, _excellent_ blowjob.

Nevertheless Ray continued until he started to feel his jaw threatening to get sore. "You good?" He asked, pulling off. Gavin nodded, still looking upset.

Ray didn't know _what_ was going on with him. But, whatever, he'd get Geoff to deal with it later.

  
  


  
  


*

  
  


Ray had a nightmare. In it were endless groping hands and hungry eyes. He woke up feeling shaky and like the ghosts of hands were still there.

It was stupid. There was no reason for him still to be afraid of sex. It was stupid.

Ray's heart was pounding and he felt like there was too much adrenaline in his veins to get back to sleep.

Ray groaned and pulled over his DS, before remembering that he was sleeping next to Gavin. Ray glanced over to check on him, but his side of the bed was empty. Ray frowned but didn't think much of it. Gavin had probably just decided he wanted to sleep in the main room after all or something.

Ray turned on Pokémon and tried to let the monotony soothe him as he felt his heart calm down. He still felt like he was irrationally in danger, but he was starting to feel better.

Maybe he should go and join Gavin in the main room for some comfort? Actually, no, he kind of really didn't want to be touched just then.

He grabbed one of the pillows and curled up into it, feeling stupid but not really caring. There was no one to see.

  
  


*

  
  


Ray wasn't sure what to do with himself the next day. It was a Saturday morning and he was _awake_. God he wasn't ever going to bed early again. 10 o'clock on Saturday morning was a time that was only supposed to exist during conventions and visits home.

Ray ventured downstairs and found Jack lounging on the porch. Jack blinked in surprise when Ray poked his head out to say good morning.

Ray shrugged, "What can I say, you assholes were keeping me up the last few days. Got an early night." Then Ray got a bit more serious and looked around to see if Gavin was anywhere around, when he didn't see him he lowered his voice and said, "Have you seen Gavin? I think someone's going to have to talk to him sooner or later. You know how he is about coming to us about shit that's bothering him."

Jack frowned a little and nodded, "Do you think it can wait for Monday? Geoff would probably be the best to talk to him."

Ray shrugged, "Probably, just keep an eye on things, yeah?"

Jack nodded in agreement and went back to reading his book while Ray went back inside to find something for breakfast. What did you even eat this early in the day on a weekend? Ray poked around a bit, hoping that he could find leftovers or something, but when he couldn't he settled on just making himself a sandwich. Did Geoff even cook breakfast on the weekends? Ray didn't know. Although even if he did Ray doubted he would have that weekend. Guy probably had his hands full.

Ray didn't see anyone else as he went and settled himself in on the couch in the gaming room, fully intending to not move again that day.

He left the door open so he would at least know what was going on in the rest of the house. Despite that he wasn't totally into it he still kind of wanted to know how things were going, and not even totally in a 'watching a car crash' way. Plus… he kind of liked hearing the others have sex. It made him feel… closer, maybe? Like that was something he could be a part of? Or maybe it was the knowledge that his boyfriends were enjoying themselves? Or, hell, maybe that was just the excuse he was using for the fact that he was a freak who found sex noises relaxing. He didn't know. Michael had called him weird for it before, but whatever.

Geoff came and went a couple of times, but he didn't hear anything from the others until early afternoon.

Eventually Jack came inside and Ray heard him talking to Ryan. Apparently that was the cue to start the boning because it wasn't long after Jack and Ryan went upstairs that Ray heard the faint sounds of the bed pounding and the not so faint sounds of Michael.

Ray marvelled a little at how long they were going for. But then again, if they were taking turns then that would be long enough for someone to recharge while waiting to get to go again, he guessed.

Eventually after a really impressive amount of time listening to them banging and another achievement in the bag, Gavin wandered in. Ray was surprised to see him, not because Ray thought he would be up in the bedroom, but because he had kind of thought that Gavin wasn't in the house.

Ray grunted a greeting without turning away from the TV.

He could see Gavin hesitating in the doorway for a moment before he said, "Mind if I join you?"

Ray shrugged, still not looking over, "Take a seat."

Gavin came in, closing the door as he did so and seating himself on the couch, as far away from Ray as he could get, not that Ray really acknowledged that, too busy focusing on his game.

He was a little disappointed that Gavin had shut the door though, but there was no way he was going to actually admit that he wanted to listen to the bang session, so whatever.

When Ray finally did look over at Gavin he felt a pang in his stomach at the fact that he didn't look good. Ray doubted it would be obvious to anyone other than one of them, but to Ray it was pretty startling. Gavin looked tense and anxious, and he had bags under his eyes.

Ray frowned at him before turning back to the TV. He wasn't going to push. If Gavin wanted to talk to him, he would be there. Besides, if it was a sex thing like Ray strongly suspected than it wasn't like he was going to be much help.

Gavin never did mention what was up, but he did at least start to relax a bit. He turned on one of the other X-Boxes and distracted himself by being terrible at Halo while Ray grinded, only talking to ask Ray for the occasional tip. Ray thought it was kind of nice, and felt really guilty about it. Usually hanging out with Gavin was a high energy activity, and he knew that it only wasn't now because of whatever was eating at Gavin, but Ray still preferred comfortable silence to anything else.

By the time dinner rolled around Gavin had settled down enough that Ray would have thought that he was just in a normal pissy mood, so Ray guessed he must have been at least in the general vicinity of doing the right thing.

Ray's phone buzzed with a text from Geoff reading, 'dinner, asshole' and Ray got up, stretching out after so many hours not moving.

"Geoff says dinner's ready," Ray told Gavin, who nodded and turned his own game off, stretching as well, but significantly less than Ray needed to. Even when Gavin was being still he wasn't _still_.

From the smell Ray could tell that Geoff had cooked dinner again. They entered the kitchen to Geoff practically dancing around as he served the food, and Michael looking basically comatose.

Ray smirked at him to show that he was fine with the whole thing, not that Michael probably noticed.

It was weird seeing Michael like that. It was something that Ray kind of felt _should_ be unbearably sexy, and he kind of wanted to interpret the fact that he kept looking at Michael as him being turned on by it. But on the other hand he knew he was asexual, so he kind of felt like he shouldn't be drawn into looking at Michael at all. That kind of thing happened to Ray a lot. He wondered if the others had as much problem telling the difference between things that were… he didn't know, _compelling,_ maybe? and things they were into. He'd tried to ask Geoff once but he wasn't sure Geoff had actually understood what he meant.

Actually, it occurred to Ray suddenly, if he wanted a good answer to that then the one to ask would be _Gavin_. Ray often forgot that Gavin could be a resource on things that weren't slow motion, but Gavin had thought he was straight until he'd met Michael, so Gavin must have done _some_ sort of misinterpreted noticing of sexy women. Ray would have to ask. Later though. After Gavin had calmed down from whatever was bothering him.

Ray was so focused on Michael's pink face and damp hair, and the way his breath kept hitching every time he shifted even a little, that he wasn't paying any attention to Gavin.

But once Ray returned his focus to him it became immediately clear that Gavin was tense as hell. His back was stiff and he was resolutely paying attention to his plate.

Ray tried to keep Gavin in his peripheral as he ate after that.

Geoff looked up and smirked at Michael, who was too zoned out to do more than push at his food, "You don't like the food?" he smirked.

Michael looked up and blinked, trying to bring Geoff into focus, "Uhh…"

Geoff chuckled and leaned over, "Baby has to eat up, be good and strong for daddy," Geoff cooed and picked up a piece of food and held it up to Michael's mouth.

Ray watched fascinated as Michael leaned forward and took it into his mouth, moaning slightly as he started to blow Geoff's fingers.

Ray glanced over at Gavin to see how he was taking it and found Gavin looking kind of… deflated? _Defeated?_ Ray wasn't sure what to call the slumping of his shoulders and almost lost look on his face, but he knew he didn't like it.

Ray kicked out his foot at Gavin's shin. Gavin jumped and looked over at him wide eyed. Ray grinned, which Gavin half heartedly returned and Ray kicked him again, distracting him just long enough to reach over and steal one of Gavin's fries.

Gavin trilled a bit in protest and reached to grab some of Ray's, but Ray blocked him.

They continued there quiet food fight for most of the meal, and Ray was glad to see that he had distracted Gavin, even if he still seemed super down.

Ray was going to have to do something. Something drastic.

He was going to have to willingly leave the house on a Sunday.

  
  


*

  
  


Ray was kicking himself as he, Gavin, and Jack went to the in-door mini-golf. It was lame and stupid, and Ray hadn't been able to think of anything better, so the three of them were going to spend the day doing activities more suited to a mom trying to entertain eight year olds than full grown men, but at least it got Gavin away from the house.

They hadn't talked about it yet, but Ray could tell from how jumpy Gavin was that he knew they weren't doing this just because.

But even though this was for Gavin's benefit, if Ray were being totally honest, it was kind of making him feel better too. He hadn't realized that he was holding so much tension from being in the house. He felt his shoulders relax as soon as he was away from all the sexual tension and felt so fucking stupid for it. It was dumb, he knew it was dumb, but he couldn't help feeling more comfortable at the kiddie activities then he did in his own house when there was sex in the air. He felt like he should be over it by now. He also kind of felt like he was being sex negative or something for thinking he should be over it. Plus how sure was he that he hadn't just gotten so worked up about the possibility of being uncomfortable that he'd _made_ himself uncomfortable?

God Ray just really wished that sex wasn't a thing sometimes. It would just make things so much fucking easier.

So, yeah, Ray wasn't going to admit it, but he was actually kind of glad that he was out on this little sexless outing. It gave him a chance to breathe and re-find the footing he hadn't known he'd lost.

The day went well. Ray actually enjoyed himself, laughing and playing around with Jack and Gavin, and Gavin seemed to relax more as they distracted him.

Even still Ray was incredibly grateful when they got back. He needed to recharge his batteries, and was kind of itching to get back on his X-Box.

Which meant he was more than slightly annoyed when Gavin decided to join him in the gaming room.

Ray did his best to push down any annoyance. Gavin was feeling off, and Ray could suck it up for a couple more hours. Ray raised his eyebrow, "You need help with an achievement?" he asked, trying not to make it obvious that he was trying to subtly tell Gavin that he shouldn't be there.

Ray was pretty sure Gavin didn't notice, and was kind of glad of that for once. That had been a whiny thing to say.

Gavin just shrugged and sat down, "Nah. Just thought you might want company while the others are finishing up their thing. Do you want to play Kirby?"

Over the years 'Play Kirby' had become Gavin's code for 'do something totally sexless'. Man was he ever going to make fun of Gavin if it turned out he was freaking out so hard because he _was_ into what was going on but just being a wuss about it.

Ray nodded, "Yeah, sure. Throw it on."

Gavin was incredibly jumpy while trying to set up the game, and after the second time he dropped the case Ray finally broke his resolution to not be the one to start the conversation.

"You doing okay, Gavin?" Ray asked.

Gavin stiffened and didn't turn around. Ray waited as Gavin just sat there tense for a few seconds before he answered, "Why wouldn't I be okay?"

Ray shrugged, not that Gavin could see it, "Don't know. You just seem like you're really uncomfortable about the whole Geoff and Michael thing, or whatever."

Ray could see Gavin grip the game case even tighter, "Why would I have a problem with that?" Gavin asked, and Ray could tell it was more to himself than Ray.

"I don't know. There could be loads of reasons," Ray paused but Gavin didn't seem like he was going to answer so Ray continued, "You know you can talk to me about anything, right?" he offered softly.

Ray could hear Gavin swallow and he nodded slightly, "Course."

Gavin stayed there for a couple more seconds then visibly pulled his carefree mask back on and turned back to Ray with a bright look and red eyes, "Let's go!" he chirped as the game started up.

  
  


*

  
  


Ray was in the other spare bedroom by himself, enjoying playing his DS in peace. Geoff, Jack, Michael and Ryan had all fallen asleep in the spare room after the climactic end to their weekend. He wasn't sure where Gavin had gotten to.

He hadn't gotten nearly as much time to himself that weekend as he was used to and it was nice to breathe.

It was also nice not having to know that one (at least) of the men he lived with was turned on as fuck. He kind of hated himself for the fact that he was being a prude about it. He felt like he was being unreasonable and puritanical for having a problem with the simple fact of arousal, but it still felt much more comfortable in the house now that it was over.

He hoped Gavin was feeling that way too. But if not Ray would just get Geoff to talk to him about it tomorrow. Or, and this was an interesting thought, Gavin would talk to _him_ about it. After all, Ray had been the only one not involved with the whole sex-play thing and it was pretty obvious that was what had set Gavin off. Ray figured it was probably a sign that he was growing up that that thought didn't terrify him. He was pretty sure he _did_ actually have something to offer Gavin if he came to him.

Over all Ray was chocking this up to a successful weekend. It was probably super unhealthy how much he felt like he'd passed some sort of test, but he still felt oddly proud of this tangible bit of proof at how far he'd come.

He wasn't sure how it'd happened, or when, but somewhere along the line he had _genuinely_ started to get comfortable with himself and the rest of the world.

There was a knock on the door and Gavin poked his head in.

Ray looked up, "Sup?"

Gavin took a deep breath, "Can. Can I talk to you about something?"

Ray smiled, "Of course."


End file.
